Compassion Is Missing

My students have been expressing their concerns with failure and their future. Their worries are not unfounded, but they are nothing new.

Students today has to deal with a constantly uncertain world. People have accepted it, but the point it, we created the uncertainty which they have to accept. We also created a society of apathy and we let people fall of the edges. Sometimes I ask myself how parents could accept preventable tragedies. Likely, they don’t think much about them either, but as teachers, we have to.

We need to build a culture that accepts micro-failures and cares most about the speed of response. The chances of macro-failures will be reduced exponentially. This starts from school, and it has to be cultivated so that it will be brought to the corporation and family.

As teachers, are we doing enough?

“Deep listening is the kind of listening that can help relieve the suffering of another person. You can call it compassionate listening. You listen with only one purpose: to help him or her to empty his heart. Even if he says things that are full of wrong perceptions, full of bitterness, you are still capable of continuing to listen with compassion. Because you know that listening like that, you give that person a chance to suffer less. If you want to help him to correct his perception, you wait for another time. For now, you don’t interrupt. You don’t argue. If you do, he loses his chance. You just listen with compassion and help him to suffer less. One hour like that can bring transformation and healing.” — Thich Nhat Hanh

We should be able to say this: “Dear friends, dear people, I know that you suffer. I have not understood enough of your difficulties and suffering. It’s not our intention to make you suffer more. It is the opposite. We don’t want you to suffer. But we don’t know what to do and we might do the wrong thing if you don’t help us to understand. So please tell us about your difficulties. I’m eager to learn, to understand.” We have to have loving speech. And if we are honest, if we are true, they will open their hearts. Then we practice compassionate listening, and we can learn so much about our own perception and their perception. Only after that can we help remove wrong perception. That is the best way, the only way, to remove terrorism. — Thich Nhat Hanh

Richard Logan proposes an answer based on the writings of many survivors, including those of Viktor Frankl and Bruno Bettelheim, who have reflected on the sources of strength under extreme adversity. He concludes that the most important trait of survivors is a “non self-conscious individualism,” or a strongly directed purpose that is not self-seeking. People who have that quality are bent on doing their best in all circumstances, yet they are not concerned primarily with advancing their own interests. Because they are intrinsically motivated in their actions, they are not easily disturbed by external threats. With enough emotional energy and compassion free to observe and analyze their surroundings objectively, they have a better chance of discovering in them new opportunities for action.

“We’re multiplying our capabilities as a civilization and yet we still accept the notion that important societal progress, like combating inequality and crime — or even innovating in government and medicine — must take generations.”
— Shane Snow, Smartcuts

We have to know the basis of a human is in their value of their ability for compassion. While driven for survival and the avoidance of pain and suffering as the primitive drive, fundamentally, people persist in excelling in what they do and learn because they are drive by curiosity — anticipation of an impending and rewarding find or discovery, and they are driven by a burning passion and compelling compassion. This gives them a rewarding sense of mastery, empowerment and control. These form the basis of human happiness.

Make me a channel of your peace.
Where there is hatred let me bring your love;
Where there is injury your pardon, Lord;
And where there’s doubt true faith in you.

Oh, Master grant that I may never seek
So much to be consoled as to console;
To be understood as to understand;
To be loved as to love with all my soul.

Make me a channel of your peace.
Where there’s despair in life let me bring hope;
Where there is darkness, only light;
And where there’s sadness, ever joy.

Make me a channel of your peace.
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
In giving to all men that we receive;
And in dying that we’re born to eternal life.
- — Prayer from Saint Fancis of Assissi

The fruit of silence is prayer
the fruit of prayer is faith
the fruit of faith is love
the fruit of love is service
the fruit of service is peace. — Mother Teresa